Jim Bob — The Mufty Day Riots

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Mufty Day Riots by Jim Bob

[Intro]
E D G B
E D G B
E D G B
E D G B
E D G B


[Verse 1]
Em                                   D
I don't know how it started, but it began around eleven
        G                                    B7
It was worse than the Red Nose Day riots of 1997
   Em                                    D
Mr Herringbone could not have known the horrors he'd unleash
         G                                    B7
When he declared a no-school-uniform day for local charities


[Verse 2]
         Em                       D
Now the deputy headmaster is with Mr Herringbone
        G                                         B7
At the window of the staffroom shouting through a megaphone
        Em                                   D
He says get back to your lessons now, as the building is attacked
               G                                  B7
Then from the window of the staffroom he read the mufty riot act


[Verse 3]
           Em                                   D
To all the kids dressed in their Adidas, their Reebok and their Nike
        G                                         B7
And the boy whose Vans were second-hand, all the others called him pikey
     Em                               D
The caretaker appealed for calm, the librarian for quiet
     G                          B7
But nobody knew how to stop the mufty day riots


[Instrumental]
Em  D  G  B


[Chorus]
    Am         G          B7          Em
And black and white, and straight and gay
      Am     G    B7
Would all unite on mufty day


[Verse 4]
     Em                                  D
The food fight in the dinner hall was a forty-minute gunge-fest
           G                                             B7
There was chocolate pudding on the walls, it was like a dirty protest
          Em                                 D
From the H-blocks, Mr Burton said, from the 1970s
        G                                B7
In the midst of all this madness he was still teaching History


[Verse 5]
        Em                      D
To the Dolce & Gabbana, to the Burberry and to those
        G                                   B7
In the Marilyn Manson T-shirts and the long black leather coats
           Em                           D
There was anarchy and chaos, there was looting, there were fires
       G                               B7
And still no-one knew how to stop the mufty day riots


[Chorus]
     Am        G         B7          Em
And black and white, and straight and gay
      Am   G     B7
Would all unite on mufty day
      Am     G         B7   Em
And words and deeds are noble but
      Am      G      B7
Sometimes you need to smash things up


[Solo]
Em  D  G  B7
Em  D  G  B7
Em  D  G  B7
Em  D  G  B7


[Verse 6]
    Em                                 D
The riots spread from the dinner hall across the football field
    G                             B7
The PE teacher stood there like a one-man human shield
    Em                                            D
He stood there with his outstretched hands as the goalposts were uprooted
    G                          B7
He couldn't understand why anyone could be so stupid


[Verse 7]
    Em                      D
The PTA would later blame designer label envy
         G                            B7
And the lack of some religion in the school's assembly
        Em                                  D
If the kids believed in something more than coats and mobile phones
           G                                 B7
Then they wouldn't be on the roof of the Art Department throwing stones


[Verse 8]
           Em                                 D
They were armed and they were dangerous, and some of them were drunk
    G                               B7
A group of tabloid journalists was telling them to jump
           Em                                    D
They were just about to build a bonfire for the teachers on the top
             G                            B7
And then as quickly as the riot started, suddenly it stopped


[Chorus]
    Am         G          B7          Em
And black and white, and straight and gay
      Am   G        B7  Em
Would all unite on mufty day
     Am       G       B7    Em
And words and deeds are noble but
     Am       G     B7           Em
Sometimes you need to smash things up


[Outro]
D Em		
    

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