Misc Television — Upstairs Downstairs — What Are We Going To Do With Uncle Arthur

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WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WITH UNCLE ARTHUR?

Theme from the TV Series "Upstairs, Downstairs" (1971-1975)

Performed & recorded by: Pauline Collins (1973)
Music: Alexander Faris
Lyrics: Alfred Shaughnessy





[Verse 1]
C
What are we going to do with Uncle Arthur?
                              G
A blinking stallion, is Uncle Arthur.

When he goes a-strolling in the park,
                         C
Watch your step, girls, especially after dark.

Any old skirt's a flirt to Uncle Arthur,
                                 F
He's over eighty, but how he can run!

"Give us a kiss, my dear," he'd say,
    C
And tickle you up the boom-di-ay,
                        G              C
And say it was just an 'armless bit of fun.


[Verse 2]
C
What are we going to do with Uncle Arthur?
                         G
Have him doctored like a tomcat?

You'd have thought by now he'd has his fill,
                  C
But my aunt can't bloody well keep him still,

Saturday night'll find him at the boozer,
                                          F
A couple of pints there, then off he will pop,

Straighten his hat and up the street,
   C
As light as a feather on his feet,
                    G                  C
A dirty old man who don't know when to stop.


[Interlude]



[Verse 3]
C
What are we going to do with Uncle Arthur?
                            G
A public nuisance, is Uncle Arthur.

Though he's bald, deaf, dirty and decayed,
                   C
He's the uncrowned king of the esplanade.

Nothing on earth can seem to damp his ardour,
                                 F
He's trying harder, the older he grows.

One of these days he'll have to die,
     C
What will he get up to in the sky?

Well heaven and Uncle Arthur only,

You can be sure he won't be lonely,
                 G           C
Heaven and Uncle Arthur only knows.		
    

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